Baltimore Orioles

True story…I was getting a hair cut…

…and wanted to start a conversation with the lady cutting my hair. Maybe she likes birds, so I tried, “This morning when I opened my garage door I heard six different kinds of bird song in the first 30 seconds.”

“Yeah, I guess.” OK, she is not interested in birds. Maybe sports, “This weekend i am taking the family up to Toronto and we are going to watch the Toronto Bluejays play the Baltimore Orioles.”

Silence. Then, “Wow, you are really into this bird thing, aren’t you.”

Really happened!

I’ll Take Three

“One Sunday a pastor told his congregation that the church needed some extra money and asked the people to prayerfully consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns.

After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had placed a $1,000 bill in offering. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation and said he’d like to personally thank the person who placed the money in the plate.

And there sat our Rosie all the way in the back shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and in thanksgiving asked her to pick out three hymns.

Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three most handsome men in the building and said, “I’ll take him and him and him!”

Chick season!

It’s chick season once again with farm stores clearing out whole sections of merchandise to make space for the little peepers. As peepers go, most single men are anxious for a different kind of chick season while the chicks are anxious for the warm season to wear their spring clothes.

Everyone wants something!